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IMDb > "The Office" The Job (2007) > Memorable quotes
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Memorable quotes for
"The Office"
The Job (2007)


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Dwight Schrute: What is the ratio of Stanley Nickels to Schrute bucks?
Stanley: The same as Leprechauns to Unicorns.

Dwight Schrute: I'm going to be your new boss!
[chuckles]
Dwight Schrute: It is my greatest dream come true. Welcome to the Hotel Hell. Check-in time is now, check-out time is never.
Jim Halpert: Does my room have cable?
Dwight Schrute: No. And the sheets are made of fire.
Jim Halpert: Can I change rooms?
Dwight Schrute: Sorry, we're all booked up. Hell convention in town.
Jim Halpert: Can I have a late checkout?
Dwight Schrute: I'll have to talk to the manager.
Jim Halpert: You're not the manager? Even in your own fantasy?
Dwight Schrute: I'm the owner. The co-owner. With Satan!
Jim Halpert: Okay. Just so I understand it: in your wildest fantasy, you are in Hell, and you are co-running a bed-and-breakfast with the Devil.
Dwight Schrute: Yeah, but I haven't told you my salary yet.
Jim Halpert: Go.
Dwight Schrute: Eighty *thousand* dollars a year.

Michael Scott: Dwight, why is my wall painted black?
Dwight Schrute: To intimidate my subordinates.

Michael Scott: Dwight, why is my wall painted black?
Dwight Schrute: To intimidate my subordinantes.

Pam Beesly: So you would be the Regional Manager and the Assistant Regional Manager, Andy is your number two, I would be the secret Assistant Regional Manager.
Dwight Schrute: Mmm, let's call it secret Assistant to the Regional Manager.
Pam Beesly: Mm-hmm.
Dwight Schrute: Do you accept?
Pam Beesly: Absolutely I do.

[During a talking heads segment about Jan's Boob job]
Meredith Palmer: I would never do that. Waste of money. In my experience, guys are way more attracted to the back of you than to the front.
Kevin Malone: I love fake boobs. Often times you find them on strippers.
Creed Bratton: I find it offensive. Au naturelle, baby. That's how I like them. Swing low, sweet chariots.

Dwight Schrute: Once I'm officially Regional Manager, my first order of business will be to demote Jim Halpert. So I will need a new number two. My ideal choice? Jack Bauer. But he is unavailable. Fictional. And overqualified.

Pam Beesley: I'm sorry... what was the question?

Jan Levinson-Gould: [being fired] So long, assholes.

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